Special Families Support
Love / Accept / Respect
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gulshankavarana_gmail.com
050-454 1940
"There's something wonderfully rewarding in being part of an effort that does make difference"
Dear Friends,
As a mother of Zara, a child with special needs, I can say that learning to raise a child with a disability can be a daunting task. Dealing with our own guilt based emotions, everyday struggles and societal pressures that come along with this unexpected responsibility is not easy. And to go through it alone can be overwhelming. We want to bring up our children with strength and dignity, but from where do we find the courage to go on? I had searched everywhere for parents who were in a similar situation as me, just so that we can share our experiences and lend moral support to each other. But I did not find any support group at that time. So out of pure love for my child and a willingness to understand and cope with her condition, the SFS group was born.
Through the years, SFS has grown from a small nuclear family to a large joint family... SFS would not be functional today without the immense support from: Hanifa Salim, Jeroo Gupta, Tanaz Karanjia and all our volunteers and well wishers.
WHO WE ARE-
SFS or the 'Special Families Support' Group was formed so that families with children with special needs can get connected with other families in similar situations to share their hopes, their strengths and their challenges. Our group focuses on coping strategies for the entire family especially fathers and siblings, who share the responsibility of bringing up a child with special needs in their family. We even have regular visits from concerned grandparents who are also looking for emotional support.
WHAT WE DO:
SFS holds several public events especially during the Dubai Shopping Festival and the Dubai Summer Surprises each year. We organise fashion shows, dance performances, parties and many other fun events, to integrate families with or without individuals with special needs. SFS runs a structured volunteer program for volunteers ranging from 6 to 60 year olds.
Integrating families with and without individuals with special needs brings about a larger understanding in society. Both families stand to gain and learn so much. Being a part of this group encourages all of us to enjoy the simple pleasures of life that sometimes get taken for granted. Just watching children with special needs play harmoniously with other children makes you realise how unconditional the love of a child is.
SPECIAL FAMILIES SUPPORT GROUP
- Started December 9th, 1999.
- Created by Ayesha Husaini and Gulshan Kavarana
- Ever since we started we have been meeting at least once a month with the exception of the summer camp, when we meet about 3 times a week.
WHAT WE WANT:
An important task of SFS has been to spread awareness among the different sections of the society, about the needs of our families. There is a need to educate society about the various syndromes and disabilities and how to deal with a situation when they are confronted with such a child in public.
The only thing that our children and their families need from society is acceptance, love and respect.
Anyone and everyone is welcome to join our family and be a part of a beautiful world.
Here at SFS we do ensure one thing for sure, that everyone goes home with a smile on their face, the parents go home realizing that they are not alone, the volunteers go home feeling fulfilled as they have done something meaningful and the children go home feeling happy and satisfied, just being accepted for who they are. They deserve the best and that's exactly what we give them!
Thank you,
Gulshan Kavarana
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SFS SUMMER CAMP SCHEDULE JULY/Aug 2010
Wed July 28th
3pm-6pm -Jam Jar
Thur July 29th
Underwater Zoo at Dubai Mall on the 2nd floor -11:00am
Note: We have 100 passes free so 50 children and 50 Adults will be allowed in free, the rest will have to pay Dhs 25
NO KIDZANIAE !
Sun Aug 1st
11am-1pm- Dubai OUTLET Mall -04-425 3530- Chuck E Cheese
Mon Aug 2nd
11am-1pm- - Zabeel Park -04- 325 9988- Stargate
Tues Aug 3rd
5pm-7pm- 04- 399 2500 - Hotel Tamani Swimming
Wed Aug 4th
11am-1pm- Al Nasr Leisureland 04- 337 1234 - Ice skating - Please bring your socks!
Thur Aug 5th
3pm-6pm - Dubai Centre for Special Needs
Sun Aug 8th
10am- 1pm - 800-6422 - Mirdiff – Magic Planet
Mon Aug 9th
4pm-7pm -04 348 4444 - Jumeriah Wild Wadi
Tues Aug 10th
5pm-9pm- 04 701 1111- Hotel Intercontinental - Dubai Festival City
Summer camp will continue in Aug, all the events will be at Dubai Centre for Special Needs. Every- Thursday , Sunday, Tuesday from 5pm-7pm. Transportation will be provided from Bur Dubai, Deria and Sharjah. This event will go on till Sep 5th.
Gulshan (050 4541940) / Nora (050 7390218)/ Judy (050 1532999)
I still cant recall why and when I first joined the SFS family. But I do know that it was 2 years back. I was like all the other 17 year olds who just joined the group to have fun. But as time went by, I started realizing that this was not just fun, but a lot more. The experience thought me how to be patient and responsible. These kids are God sent and mean a lot to me in many different ways.
The first year at SFS, I didnt have a particular kid to take care of. I just played and had fun with all the kids who had or did not have volunteers. In this way I got to know how each kid was so special in his or her own way. Some like playing and others would just want to be spoken to. Some would want to run around while others would just sit around in a world of their own.
My second year at SFS was different. A little girl named Zara made it special. She is a girl who is different from the rest. She is an example of a girl who is lost in a world of her own, but still her eyes say so much more. She never spoke to me, never said a word. She was not a girl who would run around and play catch, or hide and ask me to seek. She would just sit and play with balls or anything that was round. I still dont know what made me look after this little girl. A girl like me would prefer jumping around and running about playing with someone who could do the same, rather than sitting and just watching a kid ignore me. But Zara didnt make me want to move away from her. There was something in those eyes that asked me to stay and be with her.
Zara made me look at the world from a completely different perspective. She made me realize that anyone, no matter who they are, needs someone to be there for them and love them for who they are. Everyone is special and unique in their own way and this is something people in todays world ignore. They dont appreciate the uniqueness of different individuals.
The parents of these little kids have also thought me a lot. Looking at the smile on their faces made me smile too. The love and patience they have for their kids is just so incredible. Even thought I know they have a lot going on in their minds, they still manage to keep a happy face. From them I learnt that no matter how hard life treats me, I should spend each day with a smile and also appreciate what GOD has given me and not crib about what I dont have.
I havent seen Zara or the other kids for a very long time now. But every night before I lay down to rest, I pray for all these special kids and their families. I ask GOD to keep them happy because HE only knows why he chose these particular kids to be special. I pray to keep their families strong when they cant handle situations and ask Him to be with them in every step of their life.
I couldnt come to SFS as I am busy teaching dance at a dance institute. But Im making a promise that if I ever open a dance school, or even otherwise, I will come back and teach dance to these lovely kids as thats my strength and these kids really mean a lot to me. Thank you so much SFS for accepting me as a member of your family.
Firstly, I would like to thank Gulshan, Neena, and all the other people involved in helping the special needs children enjoy their beautiful and colourful lives.
Ever since I have joined this group, I have been very grateful to SFS. The untiring and selfless efforts of Gulshan and the camp in educating and bringing joy to our children are greatly commendable. She is always so excited and eager for new trips and outings for the children. She has done a fantastic job; a job which a parent can’t do alone.
We, the parents, feel that the children have enjoyed the new experience and their joy had no limits. The visit to different places gave the children a new world to explore and an opportunity to go outdoors. The children and family are very happy and satisfied after seeing the endless efforts of the group
I feel the all the people here have provided a very comfortable atmosphere and are very close to me. I am very privileged to be a part of this group.
Special needs children are just like us, but only their need is more visible than that of others. But they are essentially special kids whom God has created to be loved and cared for. Being a parent of a special needs child myself, I am very proud to have Abbas. With his spark of kindness, my whole family is blessed. And I believe there is no reason why such children should be ignored by society.
I am right now speechless in expressing my feelings and warmth. May God bless Gulshan and all the people working in an effort to bring happiness and joy to our children.
Volunteering to be part of TEAM SFS is the best decision I took. Growing up, my parents have always emphasized the need for us to give back to the society. I went into this thinking I could give something to these ‘special friends’ and was pleasantly surprised at ‘receiving’ so much from them!
I am completely in awe of their unconditional love and their trusting acceptance of me into their fold. From my experience with them, I have learnt patience, a quality which my special friends have loads of. I also learnt humility and to take pleasure in the small things of life. And most of all I learnt how to laugh and be silly.
Being in this close knitted family of SFS makes you feel welcomed and accepted .It is VERY easy to break; to just give up when life is really tough, but through my association with my special friends, I have learnt hard work!
But most of all, I have learnt to love myself a little more. It doesn’t matter if I have a few pimples or have a few bad-hair days; I have plenty of reason to be thankful…..the world is truly a beautiful place!
I have taken a lot of things for granted in my life, but now I realize how lucky I am to have such AWESOME friends. I am truly thankful to SFS for giving me an opportunity to see the REAL beauty in people and in myself!
As for my ‘special friends’, I would like to thank them all for a wonderful time. They gave me more than I could ever ‘give’ to them. Thank you for choosing to come into my life…I am a better person today!
There is nothing else I would have rather done than this summer than to be a part of this family!
"Why did God have to do this? These were my thoughts when I first entered the SFS camp.
'Sympathy' was the only word and emotion that one is likely to have whenever we encounter a child with special needs. However, the very next minute, my friend, Upasana, asked me NOT TO volunteer if sympathy is the only emotion I have towards these kids. “Kanika, they don’t need you; you need them, and you need to learn so much from them! If you wanna make some special friends… then girl, this is the place for you!”
My friend’s words proved true. Very soon I realized that these special children had the power to transform any suffering with their innocent smile and light-hearted attitude, as the word ‘problem or suffering’ was not in their special dictionary. All they understand is ‘love’.
I sensed something like this when my cousin was growing up. Even though I didn’t meet him very often, whenever I did, his love towards us was always relentless. He was different; so observant that he even noticed the slightest expression on my face, which a so called ‘normal’ child wouldn’t have bothered about. My mother explained that my cousin had a little problem in communication and reasoning. At the time, I couldn’t understand. Initially, I felt sorry for his condition. However, as he grew up, he never ceased to amaze me in his physical prowess; he played amazing tennis, just like a star. My cousin taught me a very important lesson: God has sent us special people to give us an opportunity to feel a wonderful emotion called 'compassion'
Ever since, I have always looked for an opportunity to be with special children. In the summer of 2009 I became an official volunteer for the Special Families Support Group.
My first day at the camp soon brought a smile to my face. Seeing all the kids share their lives with you and so innocently accepting you as their friend was simply breathtaking! James song: “I have a dream” was like the icing on the cake!
As the days passed, I saw myself growing with each learning experience; I became emotionally attached to the children, especially a lovely girl called Leah! Her very first experience with me was not delightful, but as the faces became more familiar to her, she began to respond. Every now and then, I saw the glitter in her eyes and the sweet smile on her face, when I looked her way. Sameira was another special friend that helped to brighten my day. Anybody would love Sameira for her very endearing and simple nature! I truly enjoyed her calling me “hey karanika (her way of saying kanika), I love you! Thank you!”
At SFS, I have learnt that it’s not always imperative to aim at “larger than life” objective but to have objectives resulting in larger and more meaningful purposes in life. I truly wish that the world realizes the great potential these special children have and should learn from them how to live through the very tough and difficult world of confusion armed with nothing but a very simple and genuine smile on their face. It is this quality that makes them a special face in the normal crowd.
Even though the camp will soon conclude and we will all get busy with our own daily lives and busy schedules, I can safely say that my prayers now revolve around the new friends I’ve made and the special little family that I have become a part of.
I was a young bride, studying for my Final year of college, heavily pregnant with my first child and pining for my husband who was the only earning member in the family and was in Dubai. My father in law passed away one month before the birth of my first child. It was an untimely demise that shocked us all and I was present for the funeral and all the ceremonies that took place after that. Im not one to believe in omens, but that tragic incident left me shaken and I often touched my baby protruding through my belly, for reassurance.
Anamika came into this world at the stroke of midnight on the night of the 4th of August and that perhaps was the second omen. In the eyes of a mother, her child is always precious and I was thrilled to hold my baby in my arms. She arrived after only two hours of labour pains and without much of a fuss. Little did I know what was in store for us. The tribulations and pain that our future held was shrouded in the excitement of our daughter's giggles and gurgles. For the first four years, everything was fine. Anamika's speech was a bit slow, but we had no cause for worry and enjoyed every moment of our beautiful baby.
My husband and I still vividly remember that fateful night in Dubai. It was the October of 92. We were getting our house painted and little Anamika seemed to have an allergic reaction to the oil paint and she started vomiting. We took her to Dubai Hospital where they administered some medication and gave her an injection. As a layperson, I trusted the doctors completely. On the way back, in the car, she had a violent convulsion and developed high fever. We panicked and called the doctor who told us not to worry, it was normal. In retrospect, I realise that there was nothing normal about it. We rushed back to the hospital where my baby was administered Phenobarbital (an anti convulsion medicine) which we were asked to give her for 7 days. One mistake was compounded by another. We didn't know at that time that this medicine was only meant for severely convulsion patients and once administered, should be continued for life. We stopped it after a week. In January 1993, Anamika started getting fever and convulsions on a regular basis. We were advised to conduct a batter of tests to try to find out what was wrong with her. An EEG showed that she had a light focal abnormality in her brain.
Summer of 06: I was fortunate to get an opportunity to volunteer for a summer camp organized by SFS (Special Families Support), a support organization in Dubai for children with special needs.
My first day of the camp itself was very enlightening. Ms. Kavarana, the founder of SFS, asked us volunteers, "Why are you here?"
I confidently said, "We are here to help these special kids."
"Rubbish! These kids don't need your help, they can handle themselves," she retorted. She told us that we were merely there to support them and be their friends. What they and their parents need is an escape from their difficult world, and we were there to give them that.
As days went by at the camp and as my enthusiasm levels increased, Ms. Kavarana discovered that I could make decent video presentations. She asked me to make a special presentation for her younger daughter, Zara, her 'angel with broken wings'. "Ms. Kavarana, what's the objective of this video?" I asked. She said that, through this video, she wanted to portray the beauty of her daughter and go beyond what most people saw - her disability. She wanted to delineate the fact that Zara was a miracle, a gift from heaven and that she was their love. All of a sudden, the video sidetracked. I was more interested in how Zara had changed Ms. Kavarana's and her families lives.
Ms. Kavarana told me that Zara taught her 'unconditional love', and that Zara helped her burst out of the cocoon that family is everything. Thus, she instigated SFS, an organization to bring together and support those families that were less fortunate. Seven years of functioning, this organization has been changing and affecting many people's life. It is now changing and affecting mine.
The video I eventually made for Ms. Kavarana was decent, but my experience at the Kavarana household will stay embedded in my life forever. It shattered my narrow-minded approach towards these children, and opened new horizons, and gateways of thought that I needed to dive into. These children are not different. They are people just like us, but only less fortunate. It’s their joy in pain that taught me the most.
As I absorbed every word that Ms. Kavarana told me, I learnt acceptance. I learnt that we should make the most of what we have. Above all the ability to light up the faces of these children, and make them feel that life is worth living, is my greatest accomplishment yet. It surpasses the materialistic accolades of medals, trophies and certificates. It is a pity that all our eyes see is this superficial image that is often concocted through ignorance. We fail to see these children with special needs for who they are - humans with heart, soul, and love; love that overflows more genuinely than anyone elses. This camp has made me realize that social work is necessary not only for the 'hours' that are required for my University Application, but also for the learning experience that no other service can provide.
Is raising a special child different? Raising a child is always a challenge the only difference is that with a special child you are faced with a different set of challenges.
In the case of my son, there were no visible signs of any issues when he was a toddler. He reached all the milestones of toddler-hood and loved to sing and recite rhymes. There was some echolalia but we put it down to development of speech. When he turned 3 years old we were a little concerned that he did not use speech to communicate even though he was verbal and could recite his numbers, alphabets and small rhymes! It was only when he went to nursery school, we got a call from the head mistress that we needed to get him evaluated because his behavior was different.
This came as a huge shock to us taking a 3 year old to a psychologist! We told ourselves that the school was wrong and obviously the teachers did not know a thing!! Well, we did take him to see a psychologist who came back with the diagnosis that he had borderline autism which is now referred to as Asperger’s Syndrome. This was in 1985 and we had never heard this term. No internet, no resources in Dubai and our family doctor said that he had never heard the word autism!!
After the shock of the diagnosis came three things.
First it was absolute denial. Such things don’t happen to families with no such history. Everything would sort out with time!
Second a realization that our child was stuck with a diagnosis which said no cure is available.
Third WHY US?
The third is the most dangerous and the sooner one gets out of it the better. Self pity is the worst enemy of helping a special child because then it becomes all about what the parents are going through and not about the child at all. But, having said that, it is important to go through all these phases before moving on to the more constructive phases of the process of helping your child overcome his challenges.
Dubai, back then had only one library with any resources. That was the British Council and we started to look for information there. In 1986 we came upon a book titled, “Autism a New Hope for a Cure” by Niko and Elisabeth Tinbergen. It was a life changing moment for us because it was the first time we found the two words AUTISM and CURE in the same sentence. We read the book from cover to cover and realized that there was hope after all for our son.
The authors recommended holding therapy which forced physical contact between the parent and the autistic child thus overcoming the barriers which such a child sets up between himself and the world. Professor Niko Tinbergen was an ecologist and a Nobel Laureate in medicine.
At the back of the book were the authors address and I wrote off a long letter to them about our son and asked if they could do the therapy for him. A reply came back in the form of a 5 page hand written letter. I don’t know if you believe in miracles but my faith in the Divine certainly grew by leaps and bounds.
Prof Tinbergen was in his eighties and his wife Elisabeth Tinbergen was in her late seventies. They wrote about the successes they had encountered with this method and their belief that our son could be helped. They recommended a therapist, Jasmine Bailey, near London as they themselves were too old to teach us the technique.
So we went to UK for 10 days to learn the technique and then practiced it on our son for the next 3 years. It was hard work with a lot of time commitment but it paid off great dividends. Our son was transformed from a hyperactive, uncommunicative child to a gentle little boy who now started to use speech to communicate as well. The changes were profound though not instantaneous. Rather, they gradually developed over a period of time.
After that, it was an unending quest to find methods to help him. Over the years we used homeopathy, Auditory Integration Therapy, occupational therapy, sensory integration, DMG, high doses of Vitamin B6, calcium and magnesium supplements, allergy treatments and anything else as long as it was not invasive and did not involve the use of any prescription medications. None of them showed any dramatic results. Usually before embarking on any of the therapies we would read about miraculous improvements in children as a result. We only saw small changes, if any and even those we could not attribute to the therapy with any certainty. One exception was AIT which certainly helped reduce the sensitivity to sounds.
However, the most important change was the change in our lifestyle as a result of a wonderful GP who I think was way ahead of the times. He said throw out the sugar in your home along with anything out of a tin or a can. No processed food, no artificial colours, no preservatives was the mantra. He said cook the way your great-grandmother cooked. This, I feel, along with the various therapies contributed to the gradual yet positive improvements we saw.
I must also include the big contributions of his teachers who helped him along and were always so caring and kind. Being in a mainstream school was very important as it helped him to integrate with other children and taught him to form friendships along the way.
He is now a grown man, who is reasonably independent, well spoken, loves to read and is very articulate. He is great at networking and keeps in touch with people on the phone, sms or email. None of this can be attributed to any one thing we did but rather to his desire to overcome his challenges and a great deal of patience on our part.
It would also be incorrect on my part if I am giving the impression that this was an easy and painless process. There were hours of work as we taught him his school work, social skills and life skills. Life can be very hard for an individual who does not fit into a pre-determined mould. 'Normal' is a terrible word; who can decide what is normal. Each person has a place in society and a right to all the benefits and advantages available. It is heart breaking when a child is bullied or ridiculed for being different and I must add that children themselves can be very cruel to each other.
As parents of children with special needs we must be ensure that our special children grow up in a secure loving environment at home. They need to feel accepted and recognized for what they are and not judged for what they are not.
While we may want them to work towards goals that we have set for them, it would be useful to remember that every small step forward comes with far more effort than it would for a child who does not have such challenges. Know your child's strength and limitations. Dont force a child beyond his or her ability. Accept the situation. That doesn'brt mean give up on improving or even healing a treatable condition but it does mean accept that your child has special needs, and that he or she is not an average child and may never be. Love the child as he or she is, not as you wish them might become.
Make sure that communication channels with therapists, teachers and care-givers are open and that you are heard as well. Get questions answered and be adamant that you must have all information about your child’s condition. If the information you seek isn’t forthcoming, find out why and consider a change in medical personnel.
Get the best professionals possible. If a beloved family practitioner isn’t the best individual to deal with language disorders, cerebral palsy, epilepsy, hearing impairment or any of the other special needs the child may have, find the right doctor. A specialist who treats children with similar needs may be a better option. Depending on the child’s needs, a team of professionals may be the ultimate option.
Get tough and be persistent. When seeking information or treatment for a special needs child, don’t stop until you’re satisfied. Make sure you understand everything you are told and when you don’t, insist that the information be made clear. Parents know their children and if a medication doesn't seem to work, tell someone and make sure they listen. Be a nag you are your child's advocate.
And finally your child is special not because he or she has special needs but because this person is special. My special child has been my best teacher. I have learnt my lessons in compassion, patience, acceptance and tolerance from him and for that I am so grateful.
The Journey
Zara is an inspiration to me and so many lives around. Zara was born in Sharjah (U.A.E) on May 5th 1997at Al Zahra Hospital. When she was only 4 months old, she had a seizure 16 hours after the 2 nd dose of the DPT vaccination which caused her to be profoundly retarded.
Zara has never spoken a sentence, never called me mum, she does not cry or laugh occasionally we get a smile from her, which brightens up our lives.
It's because of Zara that I started a support group called SFS (Special Families Support Group) which, initially started with just 6 families, and today after 6 years we are a family of over 100 people.
I feel so honored and privileged to be chosen to be a parent of Zara my child who's a gift from God. Zara is my angel with a broken wing, who's come to enrich our lives here on earth.
Zara has taught us the true meaning of unconditional love. There's so much that we all can learn from Zara and children like her they do not have any negative emotions like us, they do not have too many want and needs, they are not selfish and have no greed or bitterness, they don't judge us, in fact they just accept us for what we are. I just wish that society would show them the same kind of acceptance. The world would definitely be a better place if we all learn to love, respect and accept one another.
Before Zara came into my life, I was living in a cocoon (living only for my family and friends) Zara helped me spread my wings helping me reach out to many, many people.
Living with Zara has changed my life for the better everyday, every minute that I get to spend with her is a bonus for me, and I am so grateful to God for choosing me to be Zara's mother.
Zara got me closer to God she taught me the meaning of unconditional love, she taught me not to judge people, she taught me to stand up for people who have special needs she taught me not to take things for grantedshe taught me that even if things were difficult, they were not impossible to accomplish and after all this the world still sees my 'perfect' child as a 'handicapped' child.
I teach art to children with special needsbut you will never see a drawing done by a child who uses a wheelchair drawing himself sitting in a wheelchair, it's us 'normal' people who see the chair first, instead of the child.
My plans for the future are to write a book and illustrate it to explain to children and their parents about children with disabilities, as there's so much information about animals, wild and tame, about the noises they make, even about dinosaurs, which they will never come across in their lives but nothing is available about children with special needs the book will be published soon.
I am glad to share my story with you I am looking forward to the future and whatever is in store for me because today I am happy and plan to stay that way always!
As soon as we introduce ourselves to a doctor, his first reaction is 'Oh! You both are Parsis' and his next sentence is 'I'm sure you both are related.'
It's so hard to explain to doctors that we have seen so far that my husband and I are not blood relatives. The doctors always have tried to push my daughter's condition to our 'bad' genes but when they find out we aren't related they ask for her to take further tests.
I have been told very often by these doctors, 'Oh! You Parsis always marry your cousins, so your children are disabled.'
Let me start form the beginning of our journey
The beginning
"This baby is going to bring you luck", that's one comment I heard all the time when I was pregnant. Things were working out perfectly, Zeheer was offered a shore job in Dubai something the family was really looking forward to. Finally the family was going to be together. The pregnancy was going extremely well, Jenai could not wait for her baby sister to come into this world.
The family shifted to Dubai in February 1997. Dubai was just the place we all wanted to be in. the house finally felt like a long cherished Home. The arrival of the new baby was eagerly awaited.
The hospital was selected, the doctor reminded me of my mother so I never felt isolated because I saw my mother in her. It was Saturday and I was in the clinic for a routine check up. The ultra sound showed placenta previa so I was advised to get admitted immediately. But being the person I am, I just could not, until I settled the family. So I came home and requested a friend to keep Jenai and since Zeheer had not informed the office he could not get leave to stay with me. I still admitted myself that very night. And suddenly Dubai felt like a strange isolated place. I longed for my family to be wt me as I was always used to their love and support.
I had my fathers photograph, and that is where I got my strength and I prayed to him to help me through this. Zara was not due till the end of the month and it was only the third. I thought I had this long wait in hospital, but the very next morning the doctor came and really frightened me and asked me to opt for a C section as there was a danger to the baby's life and mine too, because of the low lying placenta.
Ok, the date was fixed it was going to be the fifth of May 1997. Even though Zeheer was with me, I panicked at the last moment as I was being wheeled into the operation theatre. By now I was in tears of panic, just then the anesthetist spoke to me in my native language. I was over joyed and suddenly I felt at peace and I knew for sure everything was going to be all right. I remember that moment quite clearly
The next voice I heard was of Zeheer telling me that we had another beautiful daughter. Even though I was in and out of anesthesia I remember Zeheer's words describing Zara to me. He said, "She's really tiny, very tiny, long finger." There was disappointment in his voice about Zara having too much hair on her head.
Pethadine and the arrival of a normal, healthy baby was making the day seem so blissful. The moment I held Zara to my breast I felt so relieved, I was so caught p in this emotional ecstasy, that I think I forgot to thank God.
Zara means 'princess' and we gave her the name the first time that Jenai came to see her in the hospital. The way Jenai held her in her arms I knew at that moment that she would always be there for her sister. Zara was given her BCG shot, without my permission, but at that time I didn't think too much of it. I believed that it was something that had to be done.
